The Cool House: Conspiracy Theory

Monday, September 24, 2007

Conspiracy Theory

High cabinets

Is there a conspiracy to deprive me of a full night's sleep?
Last night I'd just dozed off when Steven (who'd stayed up to get the cats in) came and woke me up. As usual he didn't just tell me what the problem was. He likes to work every last nerve by increasing the tension and anxiety level.
"Can you come to the kitchen?"
"Why, what's there?"
"Just come to the kitchen"
"But I'm asleep"
"No you're talking, so you're awake, so please come to the kitchen".
Now, you'd think after all these years I'd have learnt to JUST SAY NO, but I always fall for it.
I could hear the beeping on the balcony.
"Is that it, that's what you wanted me to hear?"
"Just come into the kitchen"
"It's a cicada"
"In the kitchen?"
By this time I was through the kitchen door and I switched on the lights and pointed to the alarm system.
"Stand on a chair and take the battery out of the motion sensor" You can see that I'm not at my politest when I think I've been woken up on a fool's errand.
Steven takes the chair and moves over to the wall ovens.
"It's coming from in there"
"Well open the cabinet then"
"I'm not going in there"
"Well I'm not standing on a chair". I opened the oven but there was nothing inside and the beeping continued.
Then Steven jumped on the chair, unscrewed the overhead halogen light bulb directly above the wall oven and the beeping stopped.
Then he screwed it back in. Nothing. He put the chair back, I turned off the lights and we went to bed.
He went to straight to sleep and I spent the night alternately fuming that he couldn't have sorted that little problem out without my help and wondering what caused the noise, and why unscrewing a light bulb fixed it.

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